Life is a constant journey of aspirations, achievements, and sometimes, unfulfilled hopes. It's a canvas that we paint with our dreams, some come up as a masterpiece and some fade away into the void.
The Reality of Hopes
We wish, we dream, we hope for things because we humans, are beings of desire. We have a deeply ingrained need to look forward, to work towards betterment, to dream of brighter days. This forward-looking mindset motivates us, fuels us, and gives purpose to our everyday life.
But what happens when those dreams remain just that, dreams? When what we desperately hoped for doesn't come true? It leaves us in a state of loss, a peculiar type of grief for what never was, but we wished could be.
We often wish and hope for things that we need, something that we are longing to, something that has left a void in ourselves. There is a clear boundary, a solid line, between what we wish and what we hope. A blind person would wish for a good sight, a hardworking athlete would hope for a great success. But there are some cases where the boundary between wish and hope is blurred. For instance a person would wish and hope for his care and affection. They might be putting efforts, but without any expectations in return. They wish that their hopes aren't let down.
When we wish something, we leave it to the will. We would just be greatful if it happens. Hope dosen't work that way. Someone hopes something might turn up because they are putting efforts to make it happen. Unfulfilled hopes are much painful than unfulfilled wishes. When we put efforts, we expect some fruitful results. This expectation is what makes us grieve.
Expect dissappointment and you'll never get dissapointed. ~ MJ, 2021
Embracing The Grief of Unfulfilled Hopes
Unfulfilled hopes and dreams can lead us to a sense of loss that is as profound and as real as losing a loved one. It's okay to grieve these lost hopes. It's okay to feel a sense of mourning for the future that we envisioned but didn't come to be.
This grief is not a sign of weakness, but rather a testament to the depth of our ability to hope, dream, and love. It's a reflection of our courage to aspire, even in the face of uncertainty.
Journey Through the Grief
The journey through this kind of grief is personal and unique. Like the well-known five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance, you may find yourself experiencing a rollercoaster of emotions. Remember, there's no one 'right way' to grieve, and the process is rarely linear.
Picking up the Pieces
As you traverse through this process, be gentle with yourself. Embrace self-care, seek support, talk about your feelings, and express your grief in ways that feel therapeutic to you. Healing is not about 'getting over' your grief, but about learning to live with it, honoring your feelings, and giving yourself permission to feel pain.
The feelings and the pain dosen't fade away, you just learn to live with it.
Beyond the Grief
Eventually, you'll find yourself moving forward, not because the grief has diminished, but because your capacity to handle it has grown. This is where acceptance lies—not in the denial of reality, but in the understanding and acknowledgment of it.
You would eventually find something new. Something that would make you push yourself further, something that would make you forget the past and helps you focus on the betterment of your future.
Grief, in this context, becomes transformative. It shapes us into more resilient, empathetic, and understanding individuals. It teaches us the power of resilience, the importance of cherishing what we have, and the courage to dream anew.
If you're going through this, know that it's okay to grieve. It's okay to take the time to heal and to be patient with yourself. Remember, you are not alone in this journey. With each passing day, you're getting stronger, and brighter days lie ahead.
Sending love and strength your way.
-Ritvik